How nice it is to be taken care of...

So... I was jogging today... for my first time in a few days... and as I was jogging, I was trying out different ways in order to make the jog pass a little smoother. And when I say this, I mean I was trying different breathing techniques, concentrating on my breathing, taking longer breaths, shorter breathes, breathing in every two steps, out every two... whichever way I did it, it seemed as though the air still struggled to suffice my seemingly overwhelming need of oxygen. I looked around, trying to concentrate on the finish line, that seemed too far away, so instead I would just stare at my feet with each step that they took... nothing seemed to distract me from the hard work that the jog entailed. So I finally came to the idea that maybe if I closed my eyes and jogged for a minute... maybe that would somehow make it all easier, I mean, I trusted in the idea that the ground wasn't going anywhere... well, I guess I can't jog in a straight line when my eyes are closed and I ran myself right off the track and skid along the tread... Cut my knee up pretty bad and my hand too. Anyways... the best part of my story... coming to work and Mandi taking care of my wounds... She poured hydrogen peroxide on it, which I learned soon after that it is actually what we're not supposed to use in an open wound, however, and then she bandaged me up like a pro. It was just very nice to be taken care of is all. The hospitality of some people and their true kindness kind of touches my heart. :)

Dun dun dunnnn...... The harsh reality.

Ok, WOW! So, I thought that I wasn't being too bad by purchasing and devouring a Chipotle Chicken Burrito, however, I was slapped by the harsh hand of reality when I realized I was consuming a day's worth of calories in one sitting!! How could I be such a fool? Well, the burrito was so delicious, with the tender and suculant chicken, the organic rice, the spicy corn salsa (not too spicy not too mild... just right;), the milky sour cream and the cheese joined forces and became the amazing creation that it was.... it was just too beautiful to pass up. It really hurts my heart to know that something so wonderful could actually hate me so much. Sad story. Well, Goodbye chipotle... We definitely had some great times together, however, I know now, that our relationship wasn't healthy, so it's over.

Nutrition Facts
Amount Per Serving
Calories 1155	Cal from Fat 375
% Daily Value*
Total Fat 41g	62%
Saturated Fat 18g 88% Trans Fat 0g
Cholesterol 190mg	63%
Sodium 2390mg	100%
Total Carbs 130g	43%
Dietary Fiber 26g 104% Sugars 10g
Protein 68g
Vitamin A 0% • Vitamin C 0% Calcium 0% • Iron 0%
* Percent Daily Values are based on a 2,000 calorie diet. Your daily values may be higher or lower depending on your calorie needs.
INGREDIENTS: 13" Tortilla,Rice,Black Beans,Pinto Beans,Chicken (4oz),Corn Salsa,Cheese,Sour Cream,Lettuce

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Here we go again...

Oh goodness.... Here we go again. Lol, I really shouldn't say it like that, for this is going to be a positive change in my life, however, its quite a creep up this mountain back to utopia. I've done it before, ate only what was worthy of entering my body, only what I knew would fuel me for the day and satisfy my hunger until it was time to eat again. I lost 125 pounds living such a lifestyle, but I don't know what happened to me, what bucked me off that horse to salvation, however, I have been living far off that path to righteousness and closer to the treacherous seas of gluttony. You wouldn't believe me if I told you all the foods that I've thrown into my body lately. Today.... has surely been a trip down gluttony lane to say the least. I started my day out, and scarfed down toasted onion bagel with heaps of cream cheese, and a few gulps of milk to wash it down. As if that wasn't enough carbohydrates and fatty dairy, I grabbed a tortilla, sliced some cheese and threw it in the microwave for 20 and some odd seconds... it was delicious, but unnecessary. And then of course, less than enough time goes by for a commercial to complete its run, and for me to swallow my last bite of cheesy tortilla, I was up and making another one, and zapped that sucker for 2o or so. Devoured, deja vu, is what it may have seemed like, however, I barely remember the experience with the first helping because I downed it so mindlessly. I am so sick of mindless eating, for it takes me over and helps to shove those unconscious hurts and worries down below, however, unfortunately, making their journey back to the surface longer and more treacherous than was even necessary. but hey, at least I am realizing this right?I don't know. But still... I was on my way to work and all I could think of was what I could eat next. I had my heart set on a cheese roll up from the Bell, however, I saw the line and decided, it wasn't for me. I made it into Tualatin and realized that it was either no food, or McDonald's... Ya know, it has been a little while since I've contributed to the devil that is Macdo. I "treated" myself to the cheeseburger filled with corn and hormone fed cows slaughtered recklessly and grounded into the patty that I consumed. However, it was strangely gratifying and of great company with a small fry, and a three pack of their fresh...ly microwaved choco chip cookies. talk about over indulge, eh? Gosh, it's ridiculous. And the crazy thing... I still consumed an entire Chipotle Burrito only a couple hours later! Geez... Its really time to stop this. There is no need for this. Alright... This is the beginning of me owning up to my addiction. Realizing, yet again, that I have a problem and that I need to be aware of it in order to turn it into something to help me on my journey through life.